Revelations...

This past week has been interesting.  It started with a conversation with God.  He told me to sit down and write everything that ever happened to me while growing up.  I ended up writing pages and pages of occurrences, and I started crying because I realized for the first time in a long time how much I have been through.  I went through a lot of turmoil before I hit the age 10.

I was wondering, why do you have me going down memory lane?  Do you want me to hurt again?  Then God revealed to me a specific pattern that I've been going down in my life... pertaining to the opposite sex.  I have the tendency of attracting the wrong kind of men... unavailable men.   They're unavailable one way or another.  There are other problems that relate to my past, but it's too personal.

Near the end of the week and on my 36th birthday, I have realized that my past does not have to predict my future.  I have also realized that I am worth more than I think I am.  I don't have to sink low to have a man in my life.  That man has to come up to my level if he wants to be with me.  Psalm 139:14 states, I will praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made.  How dare we not think highly of ourselves; we're made in God's image!  What could be more beautiful than that?!?

Be blessed.