I'm sitting here trying to work on my sermon for Sunday morning, but my mind has been occupied. I thought that I knew what I was going to talk about, especially with everything that I've been through recently. Honestly, I have no clue. This past week has been filled with ups and downs... more downs.
How do you feel when you're rejected? Upset? Hurt? Pissed? Yeah, that's how I feel. It's no one's fault but mine. I fell for someone who didn't fall for me; he told me this week. It hurts really bad, because I felt like we grew to know more about each other and understand each other more. This guy makes me want to be more than what I am. Yeah, he still does. I hated that I revealed my feelings to him. It was only because he revealed his feelings (so I thought) to me. I talked to God about how I felt, and He told me "Wait." I thought I did. In the end, I still got burned.
So now I'm at that point where I don't think I'll be found by a man who wants all of me, not just pieces of me. I haven't been here in a long time; not even after leaving my last boyfriend last year. Why is this effecting me like this? I have no clue. Y'all need to pray for your girl. I'm trying to get him off my mind, but he keeps popping up like a whack-a-mole! I needed that laugh. Anyway, I gotta get myself together so I can preach to the congregation Sunday. May need to fast for clarity.
Be blessed.
